POLITICAL OBJECTS (23)

Past:
March 17, 2017

One in a 25-part series of nonfiction stories about objects of political significance. This is the first volume in the PROJECT:OBJECT series. Please subscribe to the P:O newsletter; and purchase P:O apparel and accessories — all profits will be donated to the ACLU!

*

On January 1st, 1984, at historic period 12, I started a journal with a plan to certificate the Orwellian realities of the year. President Reagan (Big Brother, duh) had lied a lot, since taking part, and the media permit him become away with it; I wanted to stand and publicly demand the truth. On January 10th, a lilliputian quondam lady did just that in a Wendy'southward commercial: "Where's the beef?"

The three "Where's the beef" commercials, starring Clara Peller, were insanely popular. Asked, by Bryant Gumbel, what Peller's entreatment was, the commercials' director replied, simply: "She's real." Peller challenged the imitation. She was a direct claiming to the whole day-glo façade.

"Where'due south the beef" became the political question of the year: Walter Mondale used it against Gary Hart in the Democratic primary debate. (He should have used it against Reagan besides.) A fourth Wendy's commercial, in which Peller shouts downwards a lying politician, was supposedly filmed — only it never aired. Too incendiary?

One summertime dark in 1984, every bit I was working on my journal, the novelty song "Where'south the Beef" — produced by the aspiring Nashville DJ Coyote McCloud — came out of my radio. I heard information technology on Dr. Demento'south weekly radio testify. Wendy'south didn't sue McCloud; instead, they flew in Clara Peller so he could re-record the song with her! (They helped distribute the tape, likewise.) I rushed out the next morning to buy it — simply they sold me a different "Where'due south the Beef" 45!

The pre-Cyberspace meme spread. "Where'southward the Beefiness" inspired a lot of musicians. I own 19 "Where's the Beef" discs from 1984. (Rock and roll, country, polka, reggae, samba, electro rock, and hip hop). Many channeled Clara Peller but they all wanted to push through to the real. My favorite, I call up, is "Beefiness Box" by MC Cheif and Sexy Lady. This one rolled out of a record store in a Fort Lauderdale mall. In fact, Sexy Lady was a clerk at Royal Sounds and Ervin German (MC Cheif) was a customer. These are two super-confident rappers: They are totally going to detect the beef, and we are welcome to come up find it with them.

Some "Where's the Beefiness" records directly called out Reagan: "Hey Ronnie, Where'south The Beef?" was a folk/country version by Tony & Bo. But even the ones that didn't were political records. That's because Wendy's 1984 slogan — created past legendary advert man Cliff Freeman — might but be the simply revolutionary slogan penned on Madison Avenue. This should requite united states pause, since in Orwell's 1984, Emmanuel Goldstein'due south radical book was covertly written by the country. Still, whenever I heed to "Beef Box", I turn into Winston Smith: Enough with the lies. Where's the beef?

Benjamen Walker'due south "Where'due south the Beef" vinyl drove.


*

POLITICAL OBJECTS series: INTRODUCTION | Luc Sante on CAMPAIGN PAMPHLETS | Lydia Millet on PVC POLAR Bear | Ben Greenman on MATCHBOX Car | Rob Baedeker on PRESIDENTS PLACEMAT | 50.A. Kauffman on WHEATPASTE Poster | Astra Taylor on SALAM'Due south NECKLACE | Carolina A. Miranda on POCHO | Stephen Duncombe on Protestation SIGN | Marisa Silver on SHAMAN BOWLS | James Hannaham on DR. BUZZARD LP | Virginia Heffernan on HRC PAINTING | Republic of kenya (Robinson) on BURNER Telephone | Kathryn Davis on POLITBUREAU | Chenjerai Kumanyika on NAT TURNER Impress | Alexis Madrigal on MERMAID COSTUME | Anne Boyer on ALL KNEES AND ELBOWS OF SUSCEPTIBILITY AND REFUSAL | Steven Heller on JFK DOLL | Anne Elizabeth Moore on BLOOD Pressure level MONITOR | Gary Dauphin on RUM BOTTLE | Tom Frank on DNC Laissez passer | Lizzie Skurnick on Grouping PHOTO | Stuart Ewen on SNCC Pivot | Benjamen Walker on BEEF BOX 12″ | Rob Walker on CAMPAIGN SIGN | Alex Kalman on THEM=US PIN.

SIGNIFICANT OBJECTS at HILOBROW: PROJECT:OBJECT homepage | Project:OBJECT newsletter | Projection:OBJECT objects (Threadless shop — all profits donated to the ACLU) | POLITICAL OBJECTS serial (1Q2017) | TALISMANIC OBJECTS series (2Q2017) | ILLICIT OBJECTS series (3Q2017) | LOST OBJECTS vol. ane series (4Q2017) | FLAIR series (2Q2018) | FOSSIL series (4Q2018). 12 DAYS OF SIGNIFICANCE | 12 MORE DAYS OF SIGNIFICANCE | 12 DAYS OF SIGNIFICANCE (Again) | ANOTHER 12 DAYS OF SIGNIFICANCE . Also Encounter: SIGNIFICANT OBJECTS website | SIGNIFICANT OBJECTS collection, ed. Rob Walker and Josh Glenn (Fantagraphics, 2012) | TAKING THINGS SERIOUSLY, ed. Josh Glenn (Princeton Architectural Press, 2007) | TAKING THINGS SERIOUSLY excerpts.